Shark

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Daaa Dumm

File:Sharks.jpg
Holy Cow!!! A laser-shark feeding frenzy! [1]

Daaa Dumm

Da Dum Da Dum Da Dum Dum Dum

Da Dum Da Dum Da Dum Dum Dum

Sobering Thought

In 2004, Sharks killed 11 Humans

In 2004, Humans killed more than 100 million Sharks

Umm...

Puts it in perspective, doesn't it? [2]

Did You Know?

The only person ever known to have the genes of a shark is Hywel Corbin, his node is so big it is thought that he inherrited the nose of a shark.The name 'shark' is a misnomer. Sharks are very worried about looking cool at all times, and they constantly say to each other "Sharp!" as a greeting and indication of how they look. A Lack of lips and the resulting thpeech impediment has resulted in the garbled "Shark!". Hence, the cause of 90% of all shark attacks is resentment of having their speech issues mocked.

  • Over $666 million dollars in loans were made by sharks in New York. It was a choice between them or bankers.
  • When not hard at work, sharks can usually be found crowded around pool tables in local bars.
  • Sharks do not eat lawyers. Professional courtesy.
  • A new form of fuel is being invented right now that is powered by sharks.
  • The shark, while atop an elephant, is considered the Deadliest animal ever.
  • Using sharks as portable bowling alleys is very popular in the eastern parts of the west coast of Hungary.
  • Sharks are currenly waging a 100 year war on dolphins

In unpopular popular culture

The shark has often been referred to in the Nothing and Dumplings adventurous adventures. According to this, if one is to be half-eaten by a shark they must be directed to the nearest self-operating wheelchair immediately, upon which they will ask Lara Croft if she is impressed. Upon the mention of the magic word, 'noodles', the spell is broken and the victim regrows his limbs; like a starfish, but better.

Footnotes

  1. The flying shark is a relative of the land shark. Most, but not all, have firkin' lasers on their heads which they use to zap their prey, along with any innocent passers-by. The flying shark was the symbol for the Whig party, however the laser on his head was replaced with one of those old white wigs.
  2. Incidentally, the theme music sharks hear when a human approaches is very frightening indeed.

See Also

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