Apple
- Maybe you were looking for Apple Computers?
“Ooh, ee, ooh ah ah, ting tang, walla walla bing bang!”
SHORTCUUUUUUUUUUTS! Djs... aaaaah!
EYES?
Run. IN FEAR!
Why? Furbies, that's why.
Wait... not Furbies. Ninjas. On fire. With flaming bears. And news reports.
Hang on, Furbies are scarier. So yah, we'll touch you with fuckin' cool furbies. Rawfle.
Manufacturing
Apples, the seemingly natural fruit, are actually made in factories at a cost of four carbon-foot-prints per box. The main ingredients are cloud fluff, brought down from heaven by angels and carved into apple shapes by a kindly old man in Sweden. They are then shipped to Ireland for the inclusion of the other, lesser, ingredients. Namely: apple macs.
Controversy
Apple has been a subject of much controversy due to its apparently racist undertones. No one cares though.
Except everyone.