Daddy's Limbs

"Son? I've got a job at last! I'm gonna let people chop my limbs off at a playground for 4 dollars an hour. That way they get entertainment and I get a decent wage so I can try to support you. Every day I'll go in and they'll cut off my limbs, then I'll roll home, spend the night regrowing my limbs with the help of some magic potion, then I'll return to the playground so they can chop my limbs off again. It's a new form of kids' entertainment. Little kids will cut my limbs off, and if they can get all four limbs in one swinging motion, they win a free cotton candy and a sticker. They're gonna cut my limbs off. Just wanted you to know that Daddy's got a job now."

The man's son nodded then took a massive bite out of an ice cream cone. Daddy listened nautiously to the crunch.