Extreme Rapage: Home Edition
"Extreme Rapage: Home Edition" is a very unpopular show on C-Span about a team of dedicated Americans making life worse for people who's lives are already terrible by destroying, or "Raping", their already trashy houses.
The Creation
The show was created in 2003 by world renowned arsonist, "Forgot M. Password". The idea of the show and this article popped into his head while he was setting on fire a nursing home. (With M.C. Vagina. Old people burning, old people burning! Put your hands up!) Password sent his idea to many networks, and it was declined. Distraught, he tried to contemplated suicide. However, while flipping through channels he noticed the channel "C-Span". He had never heard of it before but he decided to send the idea in. Since C-span has absolutely nothing on their time schedule they decided to accept it. Password recruited some of the toughest bad asses in the world including "Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris, God, Chuck Norris, Randy Savage, The Hulk, Chuck Norris, and for some reason, Ralph Macchio, to be on the show. The show is directed and produced by Password himself but he does have help from his life long friend, the Devil.
The Show
The crew goes around on motorcycles across the U.S. wrecking people's homes who have disabilities, diseases, financial trouble, ect. Most of the time the people are in the homes while it is being destoyed. Many don't survive, and those are the lucky ones. :O There are a few recipes for disaster to keep the show creative. These include, fire, sledgehammers, cranes, C4, missiles, land torpedoes?, big bad wolf breath (for extreme cases), and atomic bombs. The line "Good morning _____ family! Time to die! Let's go to SEARS! WHERE IT IS ALWAYS LOW PRICES!!! wink wink..."
You may be wondering if this is a "Home Edition", what are some of the other Extreme Rapage series? Well, there are no other Extreme Rapage series unfortunately, and if there were, it would be too awesome.
The Lawsuit
A couple months later the show "Extreme Makeover: Home Edition" was created, which sparked a huuge (not really) lawsuit between ABC and Password. Password argued that they stole the idea from his show. ABC won after the judges realized they've never heard of the show, or C-Span for that matter.
The Infamy
After the lawsuit the show gained a little bit more viewers, but also came the infamy. The show is banned in all of 3 countries. All of those countries, besides the USA, were the only countries to ever even seen the show. It's that hardcore!
The Law
You may be wondering how the law plays a roll in this show. Well, since Password hired God, he basically just makes the guards "look" the other way. Or sometimes a jedi mindtrick is nessasary.
The Money
It's hard to imagine a show has that much money to afford all of those illegal explosives. Especially if that show is on C-Span. Well, Password has a few "Columbian" connections, if you know what I mean. Oh, you don't. Well, he gets discounts on illegal "stuff" because he is friends with the people who sells it. No I won't tell you what stuff is. Fine. The "Stuff" is usually explosives, drugs, and rock candy. Oh yeah, and steel. Chuck Norris get's hungry.
The Location
Although they go all around the US, the facility is located in Tasmania. Why? I have no freaking idea.
The Lawsuit
A couple months later the show "Extreme Mak-- woops. Wrong lawsuit. I get confused sometimes because there are so many.
The Sears
I know the title is awkward, but I wanted to keep the "THE" thing going. Anyway, this article is sponsored by SEARS if you didn't know so I have to dedicate this section on SEARS.
The Tumor
A few years ago Password discovered a bump on his back. He went to the doctor and they determined that he had a tumor, and that it could be cancerous. While he was home resting his buddies from the show burnt down his house. He was not quoted of saying, "Duuude. That's funny!"
The Show
Nowadays the show is still on, and they are still filming new episodes, even though absolutely no people watch it in the entire world.