I Threw Up and A Baby Came Out

I was sitting in a chair when I suddenly felt a violent nausia. I thought about the steel tanks, but it was too late. I was going to vomit.

I stumbled to the bathroom, hoping I would puke in the toilet. It's easy to clean up when you throw up in the toilet. It's more difficult to clean up after puking on the carpet. Or your cat.

I stopped in the hallway, and fell to my knees. I could feel the throw-up rising. It was too late to make it to the bathroom. I was gonna puke all over the carpet.

I gagged. I felt something very large in my esophagus.

I gagged again, then puked. A human baby spilled out of my mouth on to the carpet.

The baby was holding a lightbulb. It cried and cried and cried and cried and I told it not to but it still cried and I put a bandaid on it but it still cried.

I said "A baby."

I called 9-1-1 and I said "A baby."

I called my brother and said "A baby."

I wrote an e-mail to the governor of a state and the e-mail said "A baby."

Then, I sat in the chair and thought about this mistake.

The baby started choking. I said, "It's choking."

The baby vomited. And I came out of its mouth.

That probably doesn't make much sense, but that's how it happened.

I still lay awake in my crib thinking about it sometimes.

I think about it and I think about the ocean and I think about how it itches.

I still lay awake in my crib thinking.

I still lay awake in my crib.