IllogiMusic:I'm that Awesome

From Uncyclopedia test II
Jump to navigation Jump to search
WARNING: MOST OF THIS ISN'T TRUE AND IS USED FOR COMEDY PURPOSES. I'M ONLY 13. CLEARLY I DON'T DO HALF THESE THINGS. THANK YOU.


I grew up learning sciences and history
But there's a previously unsolved mystery
That's always puzzled my mind
I mean the answer's not hard to find
They say Galileo proved the Universe is heliocentric
But personally I believe it's T3po-centric[1]
I'm that awesome, you know it's true
Like I'm more awesome than you!
There's rumors 'bout me, I dunno what ya heard
Maybe that I see more pussy than Tweety Bird
Why is it so big? Maybe 'cause when I was born
My sign is Taurus, that explains my long horn
I don't like the Romans or any of that shit
Maybe that's why no Trojans[2] will ever fit
I'm straight up, I don't play no cons
I've got 16 miles like Olympus Mons[3]
When we're in bed I'll ride ya like a Ford
Hate ridin' horses so I rolled a Horde[4]
Everyone on this site is British, I am not
Sit the fuck down you homo-ass twat
I'll offend you 'cause it is fun
Cause my marriages start with a shotgun[5]
I don't buy you abortion; I only buy you lunch
And when you're not lookin; up your uterus FALCON PUNCH!
I'm like University of South Carolina, I ain't lame
And my big ol' cock is ready for game
I'm a real G as in god-like
You're hair's pretty short; Hm... I've never fucked a dyke
When we're done with sex, I don't care
I'll be like the Tony Danza Show; off the air!
  1. I only used that gay nickname for rhyming purposes.
  2. As in Trojan condoms
  3. A 16.7 mile high mountain on Mars
  4. Because most of the Alliance in WoW ride horses.
  5. As in shotgun weddings