IllogiMusic:Wrap

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The following is meant to combine all of the elements of the shitty music that is popular today. Enjoy.
Shawty, oh shawty.
I'm like the floorin' comp'ny I got hard wood
And you know when I fuck you Imma fuck you good
Cause I treat you nice,
Buy you ice
Don't fuck you once, I fuck you twice
Three times just for the charm
My dick givin' yo pussy harm
And I'm a playa, ain't give a damn
Eat you up like Silence of the Lambs
Jump around like a crazy lemur
Clean your carpet like Stanley Steemer
If you get pregnant I do not give
Thousand baby mamas ev'ry where I live
Get an abortion no one cares
If not I'll push you down the stairs
I'll say my bad, didn't mean to hurt her
Too bad you think abortion is murder
They put me on trial; don't mean shit
Like O.J. Simpson I'll be acquit
I win and rub it in your face
Paid off the jury just in case
You call me a monster just like Thriller
I say, "Wah, wah, I ain't a baby killer
unless a fetus is technically a baby and then I guess I am I mean....
Fuck it! I'm done with games
They call me magic like David Blaine
Except when I say the notion
That I don't go around with no emotion
I'm white, not blue or green
Like Vanilla Ice without copying Queen
Meet another girl, she is fine
She'll be my six I'll be her nine
When we make sexy time
Wait... That's a guy on guy position? Shit...
Well she was hotter than the sun
In the taxicab we were havin' fun
I looked at her, she grabbed my groin
It was good until the cabbie said, "Can I join?"
I'm like, "I'm not gay"
He's like, "But I love a three way"
I'm like, "Get like Robinson Crusoe; CAST AWAY"
Because I'm a big shot, I get what I need
I call it power you call it greed
People want me dead? I get others to bleed
Bodyguards gettin' kill while I'm smokin' weed
I'm not Canadian; I ain't a hoser
I'm not Asher Roth; I ain't a poser
But I sure as hell was lovin' college
For the partyin' FUCK KNOWLEDGE
All of the professors were really pissed
Because academic probation was like a guest list
If they sneak it we kick the nerds out
That's what state college is all about
Was kicked out sophomore year
I knew that I would cheer
My parents shed a tear
When they realized the end of their boy's potential was near
But I said fuck them and climbed the ladder
Cause I knew it would make them madder
They never knew how my rapping would stem
Now I got more street cred then Enimenem
But this was all a dream; the rap that I told
I mean; I'm a suburban white kid who's thirteen years old.