IllogiNews:Overly-duped salad bowls finally discover breakthrough box design

This article is part of IllogiNews, your sauce for chips and sausages.

19rd Jeremy "Twenty-ten"

FRONTAL LOBE, My Brain - In other unimportant and uninteresting news, a amateur group of inventors recently overcame their one hundred and twenty three year long struggle of finding a new, more efficient design for the cardboard box. The group of idiots inventors, commonly known as Invents Sense were ecstatic over their unlikely discovery.

The new design stumped the inventors for several years, who started to tackle the idea of making an efficient shape for storage years before the box was even invented. Now, years later, they finally discovered that the supposed best shape is that of a female ostrich. However, it turns out that years before their discovery boxes in the shape of ostriches were discovered obsolete to that of the cube. The inventors refuted this and pouted of into their home, the plate cabinet, where they promptly poopped the bottles of one hundred and forty year old champagne they were keeping for the event.

However, our reporters were disappointed to discover that that group of inventors were really just a jumble of antique salad bowls, and attempts at interview proved futile and simply stupid. Because of this setback, I simply decided to interview Jimmy B. Farkle, the local hot dog stand operator. "I guess this new design will really impact society, or something. Say, wanna buy a chili dog? Business has been a little slow this morning."

This discovery has not only proved useless, but is "so twenty years ago" according to one begrudged Frankfurt McDong. Frankfurt, who is also known as McDongalds and is the only other person who cares about the salad bowls and their discovery, was also quoted saying: "[W]hen was the last time you saw someone using a box in the shape of an ostrich? It's all about lions nowadays! Keep with the times, you stupid bowls!" However, after several minutes of struggle, this person was shipped off to the loony bin for the simple fact that he was as crazy as the salad bowls undisclosed reasons.