Microsoft
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AND NOW FOR THE TRUTH!
“Microsoft sucks!”
Microsoft is a well known home development company that started out in the business stealing computer monitors from Apple and using them as windows.
Packages
- 95 Windows.
- 98 Windows, limited time offer.
- Full houses, complete with Windows of course.
- Gates.
Competitors
- Mac users, naturally.
- Warning: this section was not written by a Microsoft Officer
Microsoft users use tools of mass destruction. What a concept!
They are very proud of their computers heaps of trash, for some weird reason, and don't seem to realize that macs are better. They boast that their computers are "cooler looking". Well, maybe they are. But looks aren't everything...
Microsoft Users
- You, which is probably experiencing the kernel panic as we speak.
- Your Mom, see above.
- Adam West, staring in horror at the Sad Microsoft computer that is his screen.
- Oprah, trying to write her script but keeps getting the autonomous shutdown.
What Microsoft Can Do
- Nothing, except boast their kernel panic screen.
- Be annoying. Especially when that Sad Microsoft is in your face.
- Take up space, on your desk and in your bin.
- Annoy mac users, because we get tired of smashing those PCs up. Sledgehammers ain't light to be carrying around for a day.
- Force a whole nation to grab their guns and head out to the PC factory to do some Microsoft huntin'.