Sassy But Classy

A long time ago there was a dolphin named Sassy Sally who lived in an aquarium at Sea World. Sassy was very classy. Sassy was the classiest of all sassy sassers. The story unfolds...

Early Days

Sassy Sally (who we will refer to as Mistress for the rest of this story) had ambitions to run your local cornerstore. Some would say that this is impossible because dolphine + air forever = death. Wrong. Sassy Sally wouldn't let anything stop her. Until, well...

The Escape

Midnight. The guards are asleep. 6 bottles of cognac is just enough to knock out an entire force of Sea World guards. Maybe even more, but the point is, the time for escape is now. Mistress makes a dashing move for the underground bridge, parallel to the above ground bridge, but... underwater. She has no close calls, and saw an amazing sight outside of Sea World. Apart from her lungs collapsing, she saw in her last breath of...air? So, yeah, she took a breath of air, basically destroying herself, while watching a horse-tracker chase down 4 1/2 horsi (one was either a miniature pony or just a toxic waste accident).

The Outcome

Mistress died, 3 Sea World guards died of alcohol poisoning, and the horse-tracking tree fell on the now official miniature pony and crushed the life out of it. Also, I think alot more people in the world died that day, probably now too, but c'mon! This is the story of Sassy Sally. She was soooooo classy... *how classy was she?* She was so classy that she stole the heart of Shamu! (I know, horrible joke, but i got really bored and this is the result :P)