TV Funerals

A TV Funeral is a funeral in which a television is turned on in the background, so people can watch football games rather than pay attention to the rather boring and uninteresting sermons of the Preist. Sometimes at TV funerals, a large flatscreen TV is placed directly on top of the coffin, so people can stare at the coffin and pretend to be mourning when, in fact, they're enjoying the newest episode of this year's hottest dating show. TV graves are also available--these are gravestones with flat-screen televisions on top of them, so people can flip channels whilst visiting a grave. "It gives me much more incentive to visit my deceased grandfather's grave," says one man, "I mean, normal graves are BORING. They're just rocks. But now, if I go to see my grandfather, I can turn on a football game and bring my friends, and then we can dance on my grandfather's body when someone scores. It's awesome."