This is the 180th article I've written on illogicopedia
That's right folks! This is THE's 180th article!
180!
A very high number!
Much higher than 3 or even 5!
180 articles. How did I find this out, you might ask?
I copied and pasted my list of articles from my userpage into microsoft word.
The list took up nine pages. I think.
Nine.
And then I used a very mathematical secret method (that only people with over 100 articles can use. In your face.) to calculate how many articles I had written. And guess what I found out? Can you guess? Hint: it's in the title of this article.
YEP! 180. My previous article, Whoa my gosh, which was a rewrite, was number 179. So this is 180. So now it's time for a 180th article PARTY!
Except.
The thing is.
This article really isn't that special. Other than the fact that it's number 180.
It's really quite a mediocre article.
Come to think of it.
Most of my articles are.
Most of them might as well not even exist.
They probably don't exist. They're probably illusions.
I probably don't exist.
Damn.
Nine blank pages. How somber. Like an empty house or a bed full of paper.
I digress.
Anyway, this is my 180th article. Even if it is kinda dumb. It's still 180. I bet Abraham Lincoln never wrote 180 illogicopedia articles. I bet Albert Einstein never wrote 180 illogicopedia articles.
My first article was Cabbage. It was about me trying to find a cabbage. I'm still looking for one. You know what I have now? You know what I have in my garden (which I don't have) in my head (which I hope I have) and in my hands (which I have, but I'd be better off with a garden)?
Figs.
Ambiguity.
An orange carrot shimmering.
A sun behind some curtains that keeps me from going blind but also keeps me from seeing.
Speakers to my left and to my right, both of which essentially saying the same thing.
MEH shave.
Nothing but napkins.
If you give a walrus anything in particular.
My face keeps itching. I keep having to scratch the itches.
I keep having to stop typing and scratch the itches.
The score thus far
Articles: 180
Orange things: So many that people may have noticed
Itches: 200
Fearutres: 8
Cabbages: zero. Of course.
Figs: So many that I think they've taken over the construction of this article.
''''''''''NO WE HAVENT''''''''''''
No matter how old as I get,
no matter how much my face sags,
no matter how much my joints creak,
no matter how much my internal organs malfunction with age,
There is something I will never do,
Ever...that is,
I will never,
Ever,
Ever,
Ever,
Ever,
Ever,
Ever,
Ever,
Ever,
Ever,
EVer,
EVEr,
EVER,
EVER EVER EVER,
EVER EVER EVER EVER,
EVER,
EVER,
Ever,
ever,
EVEr,
EVer,
Ever,
ever,
EVER think of a way to end this sentence...