Thomas Jefferson
too bizarre for Uncyclopedia, but Illogicopedia loves random stuff. |
File:Uncyclopedia.png → File:Wiki.png |
“The dude was a player, and I wouldn't have had it any other way.”
Thomas Jefferson was the the 10th President of the United States and the 17th President of the United Spades of Amerika. He used to live in a large round stone hut in the DC. He got tired of all the tourists running around in his home and turned to stone.
Thomas Jefferson once owned a horse named Bess. She ate him and pooped out his bones. Thomas Jefferson was diagnosed with jungle fever at a young age. When elected president, he coined the phrase "Once you go black, you never go back".
Thomas Jefferson, or "Tommy" as he preferred to be called, greatly enjoyed the pleasures of Marijuana and Opium, both of which he grew.
Contrary to popular belief, Thomas carried two huge breasts instead of two sagging sacks of small monkeys on his chest.