Worktime

“Hi ho, hi ho, it's off to work we go.”

- The Seven Dwarves on remarking on a couple of 6ft prostitutes just before the lazy mini-men are called back to their jobs

My back hurts

Worktime, in full "the pasty white guy's equivalent of hammer time", is a unique time during the day which, despite bringing numerous positive affects to the body and mind, is dreaded and put off by 94% of the population (the population didn't originally correlate exactly to any multiple of 100, so we had to kill off a few hundred people to avoid getting a decimal). Worktime nigh always requires a high input level, but this horrifying notion can be countered with the offer of porn.

I are now cwippled

For example, worktime started when I began this article, and I don't think I've put in enough activation energy to continu-