Ah am a tomato

Hello. I am a tomato. Also, I am speaking to you.

This is me.

Don't tell me I'm editing Illogicopedia, that's a lie. I am speaking to you.

I would like you to compare yourself to a tomato. Then you must focus your mind on your tomato-y side.

Okay, enough with the mystical stuff. I'm a tomato, and I got a new haircut.

And this is my haircut.

My best friend the carrot

The carrot is either homicidal and screaming or electrostatic grue. It all depends on the context.

Contest?

Yep, a tomato contest.