Goldfish

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“In Soviet Russia, goldfish flushes YOU!!”

- Yakov Smirnoff on on goldfishes

Goldfish, or "Gay-lords" as they are more commonly called, are the only aquatic animal composed of a metal, specifically Gold. They are prone to sinking to the ocean floor due to their lack of buoyancy or memory. They are often scooped up by mermaids who will use them as weapons in the Cold War.

They have been on the endangered species list since 1976, because animal rights activists melt them down and sell the molten bodies to fund their jihad.

Candrenna is inhabited by debating goldfish, among other things.

"Goldfish swallowing" was once a common college competition, however non-Yalies being too poor to afford the real thing, they ate goldfish crackers instead. Since chewing the cracker was an automatic disqualification, many students choked and were deprived of oxygen to the brain for extended periods; these later went on to great success in politics.Half of the best lawyers have swallowed goldfish in their earlier years if they didn't choke and die.

However, the name 'goldfish', is actually a heap of bullshit, as there are many goldfish that are actually not gold. Take for example, the Siamese Fighter, an incredibly aggressive goldfish that is rarely seen in any shade other than red.

last night a mainiac tried to drown a fish. It has been proved that Mrs Pidgeon (ginger haired coo'ey) of the CHS was the mainiac but it hasnt been proved that she killed the fish so his identity will remain anonamous.

when a goldfish falls in love with a bettafish, a great white shark will come to the bettas rescue the goldfish will then go to the wedding between the great white and the betta, and eat the cake






it is thought that the average goldfish is about 300000000 lbs there are many different types of goldfish that include half carrot goldfish full carrot goldfish quarter carrot goldfish and empty carrot goldish

many people have tried to create the ultimate goldfish by combining a goldfish with silver

gold and silver are often refered to in pokemon

my favorite pokemon is gengar!!! whats urs?