Goldfish
too bizarre for Uncyclopedia, but Illogicopedia loves random stuff. |
File:Uncyclopedia.png → File:Wiki.png |
“In Soviet Russia, goldfish flushes YOU!!”
Goldfish, or "Gay-lords" as they are more commonly called, are the only aquatic animal composed of a metal, specifically Gold. They are prone to sinking to the ocean floor due to their lack of buoyancy or memory. They are often scooped up by mermaids who will use them as weapons in the Cold War.
They have been on the endangered species list since 1976, because animal rights activists melt them down and sell the molten bodies to fund their jihad.
Candrenna is inhabited by debating goldfish, among other things.
"Goldfish swallowing" was once a common college competition, however non-Yalies being too poor to afford the real thing, they ate goldfish crackers instead. Since chewing the cracker was an automatic disqualification, many students choked and were deprived of oxygen to the brain for extended periods; these later went on to great success in politics.Half of the best lawyers have swallowed goldfish in their earlier years if they didn't choke and die.
However, the name 'goldfish', is actually a heap of bullshit, as there are many goldfish that are actually not gold. Take for example, the Siamese Fighter, an incredibly aggressive goldfish that is rarely seen in any shade other than red.
last night a mainiac tried to drown a fish. It has been proved that Mrs Pidgeon (ginger haired coo'ey) of the CHS was the mainiac but it hasnt been proved that she killed the fish so his identity will remain anonamous.
when a goldfish falls in love with a bettafish, a great white shark will come to the bettas rescue the goldfish will then go to the wedding between the great white and the betta, and eat the cake
it is thought that the average goldfish is about 300000000 lbs
there are many different types of goldfish that include
half carrot goldfish
full carrot goldfish
quarter carrot goldfish
and empty carrot goldish
many people have tried to create the ultimate goldfish by combining a goldfish with silver
gold and silver are often refered to in pokemon
my favorite pokemon is gengar!!! whats urs?