Not Help

HELP? YOU WANT HELP!? WHY THE HECK WOULD ANYONE HELP YOU!? WE'RE THE ONES WHO NEED HELP!! WHY DON'T YOU HELP US INSTEAD???

You don't get any help! You suck. Everybody hates you. You're stupid. Everybody hates you because you're stupid. And that's why you need help.

Or, to put it more Zen-like: There is no help. This is the philosophy of Microsoft.

Um ...

OK if you're seriously looking for help, go here: Help:Contents

See also

• Help:Contents (our site's real help center)
• Help (our site's article on the subject of help in general)