The All-Enveloping Clam

The All-Enveloping Clam is the large surface directly overhead at every point on Earth. In fact the Clam surrounds Earth and traps the gases that sustain life.

The Clam's inside is blue due to light from the Clam that has been reflected off the ocean. The inner surface can be seen with the naked eye except when obscured by clouds. At night, the inside appears black and is illuminated by small potlights. An army of janitors paid by the United Nations replaces the bulbs in these lights.

Authentic documents dating back to creation state that the Creator fashioned the Clam out of a hard enamel while creating the rest of the universe (depriving an unlucky squirrel of teeth). Most scientists agree with this view.

It has been speculated that, were smokestack emissions to rupture the All-Enveloping Clam, some gases would escape, and be snatched (presumably) by minions of Mars.

Humanity has much to fear from ambitious pearl divers.