The Life and Times of That Pirate Guy

That Pirate Guy was a famous Illogian pirate. After his crew rebelled after endless searching for, The Fountain of the Magic Water, they set him in a small boat and drifted him away into the sea. He was never seen again. Now, with new information, we have an insight on his life, and what may have happened to him.

Childhood

That Pirate Guy was born in a small town in England. His date of birth is currently unknown, but he was born around the Age of Discovery. He grew up as a loner, none of the other kids liked him. This was because he talked of flying bananas all day long, and spoke of prophecies and magical water. His mother often worried about him, and one day she threw That Pirate Guy out into the snow and said, "Live!". That Pirate Guy, at the age of three, set off to "live". After a week, all he had accomplished was killing a cat, then leaving it in someone's mail box. Feeling sullen, he hid away in a small dog cage. This is where an old man found him. The old man took him home and fed and bathed him. The old man told That Pirate Guy many tales of pirates and buccaneers.