The chairs are after me

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They are. I swear.

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See?


Also, you can tell by their eyes. Those beady little eyes. If they had eyes, of course. But if they did, I'm sure they'd be beady. And little. With little eyebrows. They'd probably have fangs too, big ones, huge ones, tiny ones! God the size of their oodles. Despicable, I say, if i had a mouth, or an eye, or existed prematurely on this hat. Smack their hat all the time, core of foring my shore, not caring a bear, or a bare bear baring bold balds, sniffing unrelated relations related by consumables. Fnurdle.


“No, the etymologies are unrelated.”

- George Washington on unrelated etymologies