Alcoholics Anonymous
“Hello Bob Jenkins, you know Bob Jenkins everyone, HE'S THE LOSER WHO LIVES IN A PECKHAM COUNCIL ESTATE WITH HIS WIFE AND VARIOUS S.T.D's. WELL HE DID UNTIL HIS WIFE KICKED HIM OUT SO NOW HOW HE SLEEPS ROUGH NEXT TO A PUB. THIS MIGHT EXPLAIN WHY HE WAKES UP COVERED IN URINE AND IS ADDICTED TO BOOZE AND BEATS HIS CHILDREN! Don't mention any of this by the way. We're here to help.”
Alcoholics Anonymous is a trap set by the roaming cannibals of London in order to catch easy prey. Whilst in a drunken stupor, alcoholic members of the general pubic are lured down into a back alley by a beer bottle tied onto a fishing line. This is quite amusing to watch as the drunk attempts to get the bottle as it is snatched out of reach just in time by a cannibal wearing Spiderman pyjamas. This star quality of the plan has helped the trap remain unknown to the police as they will just roar with laughter at the doomed prey and sometimes slap parking tickets on their passing rectums.
Once the prey has been transported back to the pride of cannibals (a giant spiderweb in innercity London with naked Jews seated attentively around the edges) the doomed drunkard will be slapped repeatedly whilst revolving slowly at gas mark 7. After the prey has cried the cannibals feast on their victim. They won't need to eat for another week.
| Adventure | Alcoholics Anonymous | Gh |