Friedrich Nietzsche
“The surest way to smack people in the head is to smack people in the head”
“If we believe in our fists, we can smash anything”
“ Nietzsche was like a big walking fist and he shouted like a baboon”
A man who smashes people with words is called a wordbomb.
The Trial of Friedrich Nietzsche
Nietzsche was accused of murdering God and was going to plead guilty, but then his lawyers got him off by pleading the insanity defense. It took alot of crazies to kill God. He had the serious Crazies. Anyway, he died shortly after the trial, apparently having been killed by God. This caused a stir amongst logicians and philosophers because of the cause-effect problem involved. How can God have killed Nietzsche while insane if God later killed Nietzsche? This caused much confusion until it was discovered that God is now a zombie. That cleared everything up.
The Subsequent Conversation between Nietzsche and God (and Various Other Illustrious Interlocutors)
“God is dead.”
“Friedrich Nietzsche is dead.”
“Philosophy is dead.”
“I'll fix that by flying around the Earth backwards really fast in order to reverse the flow of time!”
“Won't work! You're not German enough.”
“Shaddup. The Superman can do whatever he wants”