Harry Potter

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Those of you foreign enough to have actually read my title and clicked the link will now be hex-pecting (heh, see what I did there?) a long and boring article to go with it. Instead, I have opted to fill this space with a slightly edited extract from the popular children's porno-mag, Harry Potter and the Listener of Alakazam.

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Barry Trotter ripoff.

Please stand for the entry of this text.

Curtains open, Harry is tossing off a statue of himself and his half-brother-turned-sex-slave Ron is sodomizing the idealisms of Christianity.

Harry: Hey, Ron, blarble-garf?
Ron: Your speech seems to have disintegrated into meaningless pigeon excretement.
Harry: Oh yes, so it has, my bliss-take, I forgot to speak Engrish.
Ronald: That's perfectly allmight, my slightly fat elder-crab.
Harry: Are you implying that I have too many fingers?
Rofl: That is none of our business.

Enter Steven Hawking, the female of the threesome, filling in for Hermionie who blew up

Harry: Oh my, what a startling plot twist!
Rob: Indeed, my hairy-dairy counterpart.
Mr Blobby: Bleep bleep bloop blop.
Harry: That information is incorrect, you inspirational son of an A4 sheet of verbal diarrhoea!
Rod: Indupidably!
Harry: My Harry sense is tingling, either trouble is close by or I have an erection.

Pope enters and shakes his rudebox, curtain closes, audience claps, everyone tells their friends about this site.

See also

Harry Potter and the Infinite Marketing Scheme

Another WeasleyBarry PotterHappy PotterHarry PotterHairy Peter and the Writer's So StonedHarry Potter and the Chamber of Somethings‎Harry Potter and Photographer of Al JazeeraHarry Potter and the Goblet of WaterHorcruxMugglismSnape kills DumbledoreThe Famous Dead Bird in Scene 27 of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Nachos