Kelsey
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Kelsey, otherwise known as Karl Marx, is a brand of Scottish toilet paper. It was rumored to have been invented back in 13434 by Christopher Columbus. Meh, this article is the truth, no matter what them tards at Wikipedia say. See! IT BE ALL LIEZ! Nonetheless, this article will seek to tell the truth, and nothing but the truth. Or your money back.[1]
Anyear, to stop the dispute of the lies Wikipedia is spreading about this central part of Scottish society, Kelsey isn't a name. Get it right, idiots! It is a luxurious toilet paper that all sane Scotsmen use. Anwho, I think that solves it. Good morrow, ignoramuses!
- ↑ Guarantee void on weekdays, weekends, holidays, congressional session days, leap years, crap days, and days when Wacko Jacko's body is reported missing.