Massie Block

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“Ehmagawd! Whoever wrote this is such a LBR!”

- Massie Block on , on the following article

Massie Block is a stuck up, mean, nasty, cliquish, vile, uncaring, spoiled... well, I think you get the point -- girl in the Clique series by Lisi Harrison. How Lisi Harrison could stand to write about such an awful girl is unknown. And even more unknown in why almost every teenage girl in the world wants to be like this LBR. Some people need serious mental help, and fast. Massie Block live in the place where the moon smashes into it and then it rises and gets light up? Reference. By the way what is a gawd. And what is a ma. Ma is her mom of course.

Massie Characteristics

  • Wears doctor and old grandma clothes
  • Wears ugly Keds
  • She likes saying hi
  • Green skin
  • Orange Hair
  • Ugliness
  • Crazier than [[Heather][BTW THIS ARTICLE IS FAKE AND SOO NOT TRUE IF I WERE U I WOULDNT KEEP READING!]
  • WEIRD
  • MEAN
  • IDIOTIC
  • RETARDED
  • RETARDO
  • MAL
  • BAD
  • HTTP://WWW.HIMINAMEISBLAH.COM
  • Saying "I am a worst loser like ehmagawd i am a loser like totally ehmagawsh i am an idiot like totally i am truly a retarded retarded iditic idiot now that was idiotic loserish and retarded. haha.
  • ANMSLDJALJDKLAJSLDJKASLKJ
  • Two Heads
  • One eye on the left head
  • Orange hair on only one head. it looks linkaroo to her. Linkaroo!
  • Did i mention one of her heads is green and the right one yellow.
  • She has one big nose on both heads.
  • Mouths all over her face. MASSIE TAKIN OVER DA WORLD!!!!!!!!
  • heather was here
  • lol
  • ok now back to the
  • characteristics
  • She likes spreadsheets
  • She likes making out with Todd
  • She is a
  • She
  • Massie
  • Massie is jhadkljfaheruasfkserhuaserkjuhiaserkjdhl
  • She is almost as sexy as meee(:
  • Massie is a crazy mean person
  • emygawd ENOUGH ALREADY
  • Spoiled (either definition works)

What Massie Likes

  • Making out with doors
  • Making out with poles
  • Making out with yo momma
  • Making out with Adam West
  • Getting whatever she wants, whenever she wants
  • Popularity
  • She likes Heather the mostest most!!!!!!!
  • She likes bothering Horses4Ever

but wait...she doesn't know Horses4Ever...hm...but massie still bothers her i think...

  • Money
  • Clothes
  • Popularity
  • Boys
  • Makeup
  • Popularity
  • Bossing people around
  • Spreading nasty rumors
  • Pestering Claire Lyons
  • Popularity
  • Being generally annoying
  • Insulting everyone but her "friends"
  • Shopping sprees
  • Popularity
  • Other girly things
  • Mumbling about cheese backwards
  • Gurgling pancakes as company
  • Adam West's Cat
  • Saying that Heather rocks
  • JCpenney
  • Logic

What Massie Hates

  • Me
  • You
  • Your Mom
  • Adam West
  • Oprah Winfrey
  • Chanel Perfume
  • Alicia Rivera
  • Dylan Marvil
  • Kristen Gregory
  • Ma' Cat
  • DERRINGTON SHE THINKS HE IS SO HOT KISSY KISSY GOO GOO HAHAHAHA I JUST INSULTED YOU ONLINE IN FRONT OF THE WORLD ZOMG I AM SO EVIL but she doesnt exsist so who cares.
  • Belly Dancing
  • Being wealthy and oh-so-popular
  • Old People
  • Ugly people
  • Weird People
  • LBRs (see "Massie Talks Funny!")
  • Everyone but herself, basically
  • "Losing her popularity"
  • Fatty foods
  • Cheap food
  • Fast food
  • Earth -- She prefers her home planet, Mars
  • Cheese; that's why she mumbles about it backwards
  • Anything and everything that isn't "cool"
  • This article
  • Purple dust
  • She likes to eat poop (:

Massie Talks Funny!

Yep, she can't talk like a "normal" person -- since she likes to believe that she is important, she talks differently than other people. Some Massie-like words: are: MASSIE TALKS HOMICIDAL and i suggest you not see her homicidal vocabulary.


  • Ah-bviously
  • Ah-mazing
  • Ah-dorable
  • Ehmagawd!
  • LBR (Loser Beyond Repair)

... Yeah, so she likes to say "ah" funny, and thinks there is a "w" in "God". She also likes to insult people. But you knew that already, assuming that you read the rest of the article too.

The Problem Massie is Creating

Because of Massie, teenage girls want to be tools of massive destruction.Isn't that sad? Oh well... not my problem. The spoon jumped over the chicken.

YEAH IT IS YOUR PROBLEM HORSES YOU GOTTA BE MORE RESPONSIBLE hehehe btw horses i missed talking to you like that for a long time. a lot of friends missed.

Other Places Where You Can Read the Truth

Unfortunately, since Massie "wannabees" get so mad when people "diss" their idol (uggh... glork!), few places on the internet actually tell the truth about Massie. Only two have been found. One is this article (and if you have trouble finding it, here is a link: Massie Block), and the other is How to Change How You Think About Massie Block. If you can, spread the word! Send links to these two articles to everyone you know! There is still time!

And also get a Clique book from the library and one of the pages has said "This Article Is For Fictional Purposes only, which means the stuff in this book cant relate to anyone living or dead." Trust me i aint lying.

What Would Massie Say if Someone Tried to Delete this Article?

Well, you asked for it.

Probably something along the lines of:

"Ehmagawd, like, you want to duh-lete it? *flips hair* Ehmagawd, like, only LBRs would duh-lete it! *Examines manicured nails* Whatevs, I'm going to buy like 1,000 dollars worth of, like, clothes. Come on Kuh-laire."

Did you really have to know that?

ZOMG i mean where da heck did she get Ehmagawd from i prefer ZOMG