Pheasant

“Quiet, peasant!”

- A non-too-pleasant pheasant

The pheasant has no agenda. Neither does it have a gender, as all pheasants are asexual.

You may think that makes it a prime candidate for a poor article: simply not so, for whilst the pheasant may have no agenda, it doesn't mean this highly common bird hasn't got into all manner of interesting scrapes in its lifetime.

Unfortunately, this is neither the time or place to discuss that: consider joining your local ornithology club for more information, lest ye be cast aside like a crying infant.

See also

• The Pheasant Plucker
• Willy Wonka
• A piece of fluff