Spelunking amendments

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The Spelunking amendments were a series of edits and additions to the Tablets of the Cave, a series of tablets that provided laws and guidelines for cave dwellers. These amendments have defined the cave civilizations for centuries on end. For more information on of the Tablets of the Cave or cave dewllers, see here.

Specifics

Article I.

Any who apply grappling hooks, ballistic pressure holders, or any such forms of artificial grips shall have the right to do so; any damage that may occur due to this application(s) of artificial grip will be held responsible to the spelunker who applied it.

Article II.

Any spelunker who knowingly enters area of danger has the right to do so; however if the incident of death occurs the spelunker can be held responsible and required to pay a fee of up to $1000.

Article III.

If there is any sort of storm, thunder or none, spelunkers will be required to purchase a chameleon to accompany them on their climbs for protection. Those who fail to do so can be fined up to $25.

Article IV.

In the event that any spelunker dies, signs shall be placed in memorial/warning, and the cave shall be closed for a period of time sufficient for the rotting of the body.

Article V.

In the event that a bear dwells in a selected cave, one must purchase a permit to eat sandwiches within the cave, for it is punishable by law if it is not done.

Article VI.

This article has no need, for it is pointless.

Article VII.

Spelunkers advance at their own risk. Exceptions include: when they are forced to proceed, when they are threatened to proceed, when they are in that state of hypnosis when proceeding. In these cases, one is held responsible for any damages, including broken water pipes, which is a finable offense.

Significance

These amendments to the Tablets were well earned, and the amendments took several days as carving stone is a long process. Ultimately, they became useless as the only spelunker, Joseph IX, the same man who lead the cause of adding this amendments to the tablets, died and no one has spelunked since.

See also