The Internet Garden
The Internet, that vast tundra of knowledge slowly imploding on itself, needs watering twice daily; otherwise its factual accuracy and reliability might be compromised. Oh, who am I kidding? The Internet is a hell hole where random bits of intelligence float amongst vast oceans of idiocy. I mean, I'm doing a school project on Victorian Sewer Systems and I type the word "Manhole" into Google and what do I get - a picture of a man stretching his anus to a disproportionate size. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! GET THAT OUTA HERE!!!
As I wander through the garden I see many different trees and shrubs. On the left are Google, Wikipedia and Yahoo - gigantic trees so tall that passing spaceships crash into their tallest branches and birds are afraid to nest in them. And on the right are Illogicopedia and millions of other weedy shrubs, their plague ridden branches more brittle than a pineapple in a frozen Nitrogen. So is the Internet, where unless you are an Evil Empire bent on ruling the virtual world you might as well not exist.