Therapeutic Cat Stroking
Therapeutic Cat Stroking is the new wonder drug, developed in a basement by pasta marshmallows in Furville. Touted as the next best miracle medicine, Therapeutic Cat Stroking can cure what ales you from Aquaoverload syndrome to Acute Foot Ache.
Methods and Prizes
Despite it's name, "Therapeutic Cat Stroking" has nothing to do with cats or stroking, and neither is it therapeutic. Patients are loaded like crates of peanuts into a Large Health Collauagator and then sent around the world 17 times by hot air balloon. After this the actual treatment can begin. The Doctor will say to you "Go home, you're cured" and through the power of hypnosis you will believe it. The Doctor counts his cash, content knowing he has scammed yet another brainless fool, and you carry along your merry way unaware.
Controversy
A shocking truth was revealed in late 1887 when it came to light that Therapeutic Cat Stroking was in fact a scam. Oh, how could we have been such fools not to realize that travel by hot air balloon was just a way to make people scared, and thus syphon off "Fear" which is then sold in Pubs at a low low price. This shocking malpractice was exposed by Dr. House MD, and subsequently the government has taken control of the operation to ensure all profits go into pot holes.