United States Senate
“WE'RE RUNNING OUT OF MONEY!! ALERT THE SENATE!!!! I NEED HEALTH CARE TO PASS!!! CALL CHINA!!!!!!!!”
“I wonder if my grandchildren will be able to live on the street after the Senate is done spending.”
“Me think Senate cheap.”
The United States Senate is a money-spending organization NOT in America and is above the House of Represenatives and Taco Bell by 6766776 miles. It was founded by Colonel Sanders in Hungary back in 5467766 B.C. It consists of 5.9 members elected by the Tooth Fairy by magic. The money the Senate spends comes from China by the magical money portal and train made by Satan. Chuck Norris, Mr. Rogers, Willy Wonka, Mario, Dr. Phil, Michael Jackson and Saddam Hussein are the current 5.9 members of the Senate. The Senate is rumored to be part of Congress, but in actuality is not.[1]
History of the Senate
The Senate began when Sanders was stuck eating fried chicken with his wife Kanye West. He decided that people were not spending enough money. So he formed the Senate and since then, it has several elected represenatives and the unelected King Obama, the biggest, baddest spender of them all. Johnny Cash is a frequent guest speaker and often talks about why we should spend loads of cash on pink tutus and pinky fingers. After Cash died, the Senate has no longer had any sort of guest speaker. Nancy Pelosi may sometimes appear if she is not eating Angus Burgers at Burger King.[citation needed][2]
The Senate Today
The reps sit and do sudoku all day while Obama is talking about ways people need to spend money on stuff like ponies, health care and dinosaurs. The Senate really never did anything or does anything today. The Supreme Court, many times, spends more cash.
MJ Bailout
The Senate bailed out Jackson's brother, Jack Michaelson since he spent $5233656655645647665677676567653374767676 on chimpanzees and tacos.[3]