Readmesoon in Space: The crappy knockoff
| This product is kept in the fireplace by RMS |
|---|
“How could they not send me into space.”
“¬_¬”
Public Deeds
Getting into space is no easy task. You have to do a lot of good stuff. Then you have to get the space agency's approval ratings at at least 13% (those bastards don't approve of much).
So what did I do? Simple:
- Save some kittens from a tree
- Just be awesome
- Er, yeah
“127% approval rating. ”
Contact
Space agency: Did you just save those kittens from a tree?
RMS: Sure did.
space agency: You'll hear from us.
RMS: Buh? Who are you anyway?
The next day I received a telegram (I don't trust email or the internet, or phones, damn technology!):
- Welcome aboard, sailor!
- Your actions of gratitude have got you into space, laddie. And, the good thing is, we'll give it to you in a discount price: $1,000,000,000. This message will self destruct in .12 seconds
- Yours,
- the space agency
Transitioning
The suits are heavy, hot, and don't feature a bathroom. And sitting in a space ship tree hours before launch is no fun either.
RMS: I have to go pee!
Space agency: sorry, you'll have to wait another millenium
RMS: feck
3,2,1, Liftoff! Wait, nothing's happening... crap. forgot the gas.
After another 6 hour delay I finally flew into space, and blew up the moon. Nothing more fantastic that chunks of blown up moon! space rock pelting Earth!
<insert song title here>
an ode to my flight:
- <insert song here>
Testes just got robbed!
So much for originality 'round here!