User:Zaiger420/Brainwurms
| File:EDpolice.gif | WARNING: Brainwurms is a CHILD MOLESTING KIDDIE DIDDLER!!!. Please remind him of this as often as possible!! |
Brainwurms is a COCK SMOKING SACK OF SHIT best-known for taking it in the ass from his ghey fuckbuddies at DevianTART. Like all piece of shit trolls, he suffers from a terminal case of unwarrented self-importance, believing himself to be the quintessential INTERNETS TOUGHGUY. Ongoing research has recently uncovered evidence that he is also a SICK FUCK PEDO-FAG with a fetish for underaged girls.
He can usually be found generating fail on dA's Complaints forum when he isn't fapping over lolicon pr0ns. Being both mentally challenged and chronically brain-damaged (hence his name), his artistic endeavors are confined to posting BADLY TRACED pencil scrawls to his dA gallery, considered one of the all-time shittiest in human existence. In association with Homozito and Draconis-Wyrm, he is self-confessed Flaggot and a founding member of the Complaints Forum CircleJerk.
Blatant hypocrisy
In common with the rest of his shitfail kind, Brainwurms is a world-class hypocrite, constantly criticizing others for the very things he does himself (a sure sign of assberger's syndrome). Posted below are a few selected examples:
- While claiming he is not homophobic, Brainwurmz brands anyone who disagrees with him a 'cock-smoking sack of shit.' In addition, he pitches a screaming BAWWFEST whenever he is (righfully) branded a 'flaggot' (indicating that he is nothing more than a self-loathing closet homosexual).
- Labels his enemies 'pedophiles' and 'kiddie diddlers' whenever they pwn him in an argument. Paradoxically, he is known to favorite lolicon images on DA and to download shotacon from Hentai Foundry and 7chan.
- Constantly plays Internet Tough Guy, yet lacks the balls to fight his own battles. Instead, posts hate threads on DA and Personal Army requests out at ED (Note: was recently banned from ED forums for his incessant faggotry).
- Believes that DA's admin has the right to ban anyone without the slightest reason, but WHINES like a BITCH if someone hides his shitty comments (BAWWWWW HE BLOCKED MY MESSAGES AND CALLED ME NAMES IT AINT FAIR BAWWWWW).
- Frequently denounces tracers and editors on DA's complaints forum - despite his gallery being full of OBVIOUSLY traced shit. Don’t believe us? Well, don’t take our word for it, check out his gallery for yourself.
How to troll Brainwurms
Trolling this bleeding cunt is deceptively simple. Like every other masturbating retard on the web, Brainwurms considers himself MORE IMPORTANT than anyone else – so important, in fact, that NO ONE is allowed to disagree with him on pain of chronic butthurt. The sightest hint of personal criticism will provoke him into a raging BAWWWWfest, much to the amusement of everyone present.
Trolling sessions may be executed in a classic two-pronged attack. First: if he turns up on the Complaints Forum, disagree with literally ANYTHING he says. Having an ego the size of South America, he will instantly launch into an infantile hissy fit, branding you a troll and screaming for support from his ass-kissing fanboys . At this point, it is vitally important to remember the following:
- It doesn't matter what the thread topic is; nothing he posts is worth jack shit anyway, because he's a worthless, homofaggot pedocunt.
- If anyone agrees with him on any subject whatsoever, post a reply informing them of Brainwurms’ sexual proclivities: "You know he's a pedophile, don't you?"
- When he denies his kiddie-diddling tendencies (he always does), post links to these screencaps to prove what a lying sack of shit he truly is.
Once you’ve pwnt his ass on the Complaints forum, he will make a futile attempt at trolling your userpage. Don't panic if he turns up on your profile, he lacks the intellectual capacity to form a coherent insult. Ignore whatever he says as the ravings of brain-damaged mongaloid and take the following steps as soon as possible:
1. Hide his comments. This will result in literally hours of sniveling crybaby bullshit, because Brainwurms' opinions are too important to delete. Make sure to hit the spam button so that everything he posts will be automatically deleted.
2. Block his account without any explanation whatsoever. He will immediately bawwww to his fuckbuddies on the Complaints forum, calling you a faggot and whining about how unfair the world is.
3. When he whines that you had no right to block his slimy pedophile ass (he will, trust me), post a reply stating that child molesting homofags like Brainwurms are not welcome anywhere on DA, and if he doesn't like it, he should STFU and GTFO.
5. ????
6. PROFIT.
Memorable Quotes
The following conversation took on place DA's Community forum. Basically, some guy blocked his account for the lulz, and Brainshit threw a tantrum on a totally unrelated thread. Note how he becomes progressively more butthurt before finally pitching into a full-blown BAWWWWWfest:
- Brainwurms: WTF why did you block me you fucking asshole?!! All I did was ask a few questions!!!
- Skowzah: I blocked you for the express purpose of annoying you. Like all trolls, you consider yourself more important than anybody else, and become incredibly butthurt whenever your worthless, infantile remarks are hidden from view. Now please take your Bawwwww somewhere else and stop soaking this thread with your sniveling, crybaby tears.
- Brainwurms: Fuck you, I wasn't bawwing, I was asking why you hid my comment you fucking douchebag!!! You claim you belive in free speech so why did you block me from your profile?
- Skowzah: OK, we get it. You're so important, that NOBODY is allowed to hide your comments. No need to repeat yourself: we're all aware that you're a sniveling, butthurt crybaby. Now please, go back to complaints and stop clogging up this thread with your incessant whining.
- Brainwurms: Who gives a fuck what you think of me? It's not like anybody likes you, you fucking faggot!!! STFU and GTFO, nobody wants to read your shit!!!
- Skowzah: Oh, temper temper. Run along back to Complaints and BAWWWW to your friends; that’s sure to make you feel much better.
- Brainwurms: GO FUCK YOURSELF YOU FUCKING PEDOFILE FAGGOT!!! ALL YOU EVER POST IS BUTTHURT SHIT AND YOU BLOCK ANYONE WHO DISAGREES WITH YOU!!! FUCK OFF YOU LYING PRICK!!!
- Skowzah: BAWWWWWWW!!! He hid my comments!!! BAWWWWWWW!!!