Belgium

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Belgium, Belgium Belgium Belgium Belgium Belgium. Ah where do I start... Belgium. What a name, a fitting name. And I'll tell you why, Belgium is the only known place on earth to contain a small nation of the same name. Weird coincedence huh? It's funny how these things turn out, it's almost like it was somehow planned.

But in actuality Belgium is very very interesting, out of all the nations it has the highhest google rank. You can bet how surprised I was to click "I'm feeling lucky" on an unrelated porn hunt to find a small invadeable nation pop out of my screen and bludgeon my face. Don't worry, no one was hurt, though several thousand Belgians had to be put down. Luckily we managed to get extra work brought in at the pet cemetry and we were able to deal with the upsurge quickly and effectively. For any of yoiu worried Belgian owners out there I hope you can feel safe in the knowledge that your beloved Belgy welgys met a peaceful end, choking on their own vomit as we forcefed them bleach, watered down bleach that took twice as long to take effect. But it was either that quick and painless option or a drawn out suffering, old age is such a terrible way to go.

Vacuum Heroes

Given only on alternate viewings, this section exists mainly to cultivate a sense of Belge-ish-ness amongst non- or partial evacuants. For all other usages, please have a conversation with a non-threatening member of the audience, then subtly seek refuge and contemplation at the Brazil nut refractory or, in case of severe gummishness, at the Kebab joint on West 34th. In the morning, a short walk will take you to the sole remaining vantage point at which one may, in fact, view the verified contents.

Vacuum Products

• Paraphernalia Sucker 5000
• Lord Houghton Sniffer XL
• Rene Magritte
• Infected Abcess Cleaner

Gross National Evacuations

Countries and territories of EuroDisney